I am starting to panic—crazy panic. Remember how I was talking about the course for my bar exam being about shit a moron could figure out? Well, it turns out I was wrong and I actually need to know esoteric legal shit for the bar exam. Who knew?

The bar exam in is less than two weeks and I am just now starting to hit the books. Traveling has only made my procrastination habits worse. For the last seven months, I’ve learned to operate on European and African time, where people are too lazy or too poor, respectively, to do any actual work. And now I come back to the drill sergeant that is North America where I have to prove my worth by chaining myself to a desk and relinquishing any semblance of a social life. Wait, did I say “social life”? I guess it’s not considered “social” when all you want to do is watch the hockey game while sprawled out on the couch eating CornNuts. Why the hell did I choose this profession again?

Today is Halloween and here I am wishing I could shed this mask of industriousness and diligence, and show everyone who I truly am: a lazy piece of shit.